Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Some Friendships Run Their Course

I heard on the news here tonight
that our province has over 200 wildfires
already that they are trying to keep under control.
It is so dry here, they say Thursday we may get rain.
I know being in my yard everything is so dry.
A good rain would help us all out
............
As  I  am sitting here typing this,
there is a beautiful breeze coming in my window,
In the distance I can hear the train yards,
maybe hitching up cars readying to head down the tracks.
Other than the odd vehicle that I can hear off in the distance.
I can sit here alone in my thoughts,
oh I just heard the chimes outside,
so the wind is picking up,
the smell of the fresh air is wonderful.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
I have really been trying  to cut toxic people out of my life.
I have a friend that is so self centered,
anytime  we get together we always do things she wants to do.
I  have told her I am only good for a couple of hours,
but if she picks me up it could turn into six hours,
then I am down for the count for two days after.
When she had a house, she liked to sit outside,
Now she lives in an apartment.
I have asked her over to come spend some time in the yard
She always comes up with a reason why she can't come.
At New Years she invited me, but told me I had to leave my husband home,
because it was just a girls day. I did not go as I wanted to spend time with my husband.
Anyway she just seems to keep doing strange things.
We used to live together for a while after her Mom passed away,
and she always talks about us living together again.
She very seldom mentions  my husband,
as I think she is jealous.
I tell her that I am not moving in,
I am married, I have a house,
happy in my life.
How would you handle this.
When I try to talk to her she always tells me about a new illness
she was just diagnosed with. 
So I don't believe her,
and then I start to feel bad just in case I am wrong.
I don't want to hurt her,
But I think the friendship has run its course,
How would you handle it,
I would really love your input.
,,,,,,,,,,
Other than that I had a long talk with one of my friends
whom has worked for the same company for 23 years
and about three weeks ago the head office personnel came in
on a Saturday, packed everything up and closed the place.
No warning at all,
I guess they figured the staff would walk,
Some notice would have been nice.
,,,,,,,,,,,,
Enjoy your day,Hopefully you get to spend some time with your friends.
I try to surround myself with healthy relationships,
loving and caring people.
I am blessed by my loving and caring followers.
Take care.
Until next time,

18 comments:

  1. Cinner it is time to let that friendship go. Or should I say that person. Because she really isn't a friend to you. You have enough on your plate. This is my opinion.
    Glad you are enjoying your life and the fresh air. Spring is so wonderful!
    Hugs
    SueAnn

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  2. what an odd friend...any "friend" that has that big of a problem with your hubby has got to be a tense relationship...

    hope you have a wonderful day as well..

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  3. i had a friendship once that had also run its course....it was painful at first to let it go, but SO healthy in the end !!!

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  4. yes, i agree - it is time to try to ease back from the friendship. you will feel better for it.

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  5. When someone does not listen to me and I make it clear that in order for us to have a relationship I must be listened to like I listen to them, I end the relationship. It is important for each of us to take care of our own health, physical and mental and emotional. That's my opinion anyway.
    So bad for your friend working so many years at one company and the place close their doors. Hope it turns out to be a good thing in the long run for your friend, a better job to be found soon.

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  6. Some people are just not meant to be our friends. They want to be but they are not compatible enough. And thats OK...ease out of the one sided relationship now...be nice, as you always are, and just let it go. As they say..."life is just to short" to struggle at something as simple as a friendship. True friends are easy to be friends with. A 50/50 relationship which includes all the baggage (husband) :)
    Take care and just let it go by the wayside.

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  7. She definitely sounds like a strange one...and with your health, I think your need to guard your time and energy...Hope you find a way to let go graciously! You'll definitely be in my thoughts and prayers...I'll pray for wisdom for you! Love you, Janine XO

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  8. Hi Cinner, I think your title captures the conclusion too. I have had some one sided friendships. It hurts more when they actually lasted many good years before that. Perhaps a "break" would be good. You can always try again down the road if you desire. Karen xoxo

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  9. well I hope you listen to these guys cause I've been telling you all this for years.

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  10. Karen, true enough, although I think it might be better to sever ties. will see what happens, Have a great day, and thanks for stopping by.

    Thanks Janine, yes I think I will just let this fall apart, it takes too much of my time and energy...I Have known this for a while, I have always made excuses for her, an only child, no family....so I think enough is enough, Thanks for your loving thoughts and kind words. hugs to you my friend.

    Cora, thanks you make it sound so easy and really it is that way. Your right 50/50. true friends you don't have to try. thank you, your a darling. have a great day.

    TechnoBabe, my friend she says she may have just retired early. I don't think they need it financially, so she does not seem to concerned, although she says when it comes right down to it, your just a number at the end of the game. I am ending the relationship, and really appreciate your opinion. my health first. take care.

    Char your right, thanks for the comment on my photo this am,,,hope you are well and not too busy at work. take care for now.

    Beth, I know I will feel better having just made a decision...hope your out being adventurous. take care.

    Brian your right, and I don't think it has anything to do with him, other than the fact that she does not have a partner...you did make me laugh when you said she sounds odd, thanks for that.

    SueAnn thank you for being so kind, sometimes things are so clear when you step back from a situation. hope your wip is going great. hugs

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  11. It's really hard for me to let go of friendships because I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but it seems like your friend isn't respecting you. You could try and be honest with her and ask why she doesn't want to come over and spend time with you and hubby, but it doesn't sound like she's a good listener or supportive of your choices.

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  12. j.s. ha you caught me again, and yes after all these years, I am putting me first..I know you will believe it when you see it, maybe when you come to go shopping. hint hint, I will call you later...I think. love ya.

    Nurses Curses, when I was single a bunch of us used to hang out, I am the last friend she has of the bunch...I always made excuses, but really since I have been ill she has not been there at all...so I am cutting my losses. I have too many kind and caring and loving people in my life...maybe I am getting smarter as I am getting older,,,Did you see the pictures of Angus sleeping on my feet. take care, love you, hi to the rest of the bunch.

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  13. cinner only you can make the decision to let this friendship go......the main thing to me is that your husband must be included and respected for any relationship to work, how she ignores him is very strange....good luck sweetie, I will keep you in my heart and prayers........:-) Hugs

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  14. Hello dear sister, it sounds like your blog friends are very smart. I agree so much that life is too short, and good people surround themselves with good people. There will always be someone toxic that cross your path, wether it be family or friend, I guess we just have to decide wether they enhance your life or wether they cause distress. I know you deserve the best and once i myself realized that, that i did too that is when i decided to cut some ties. And oh how peaceful my life has been. Goodluck with your decision but i know you already know what your heart tells you, and remember it can be easier done than you think, small steps of pulling back and the rest will take care of itself.
    love you,
    Your sister.

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  15. Bernie, my hubby and I were talking tonight and he thinks it has nothing to do with him. there was a group of us that were single for a while, she does not seem to like anyones significant other. anyway I really feel it is best to just let it go. hugs to you. I hope you are feeling well. hugs.

    Penquin...you are such a good sister, and I know exactly what you are talking about. LOVE you , hope work went well. talk in afternoon thurs afternoon. goodnight.

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  16. HI CINNER

    as you know - I have struggled with a long time friend too. I, like you, had very good reasons to stop being her friend. Over time, the feelings around those reasons seemed to fade away - and although our relationship is different now - I have found a way to "be" her friend with my boundaries in tact and clear. Also, I came to realize that anything done out of love and kindness is always a good thing and I found a way to do that while still protecting my heart from her "odd" behaviors at times.
    I love you
    Gail
    peace......

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  17. so sad to hear about this. time to move on and shine amongst the friends that appreciate you.
    xo

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  18. Ohhhh...you gotta cut those toxic friends out. I had to do that a few years ago. It's not easy. But man, I am so much happier!

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