Monday, April 26, 2010

No Place to Hide!

Some memories,
so vivid,
right in your face,
you pull back,
running into the night,
faster and faster
your feet seem to fly,
the harder you run,
farther behind you feel,
Your heart is beating at great speed,
Your legs are feeling like jello.
Stop,
the memories are so near,
you could reach out and touch them,
they surround you.
You breathe with great fear,
You can feel them coming,
closer, closer,
oh way too near!
You lay there,
trembling as you sleep.
laying in silence,
wondering,
Who is there,
Cautious,
Cautious,
Beware.
Breathe.
Silence.
Safety.
.......................................................
The above is an example of what a person with Narcolepsy may face on any given day.
They have excessive Day time sleepiness, Cataplexy.....which I have explained before,
and is listed on one of the pages above. You can have sleep paralysis, where you can not get up upon waking,
and you can have hallucinations. These hallucinations are so vivid, that you have no way of knowing what is real and what is not. I have only experienced the above a few times, and am so thankful that medication helps these symptoms. Some people have gone for twenty years without a proper diagnosis.  I understand why Mental Illness is so Common, Can you imagine just for a moment if these things were happening to you. Would you think you might be losing it? How about realizing every time you laugh...you fall down,,
Imagine telling that to your boss, and see what kind of a reaction you get. The brain is an organ, that can be defective...just a tiny cross in the circut and you could be me. I did not feel whole or complete when I was diagnosed with this condition. I kept asking myself, come on Cin when are you going to be your old self again.
I waited, for almost four years, then knowing that this was me now, and there was no going back, just moving forward, living the best I can everyday. So if you meet someone a little out of the norm, please try not to be too judgemental. We all have a story to tell, some just tell them better than others. Embrace your day and Enjoy Your Monday. One last thought, please give thought to being an Organ Doner. There is so much research that still needs to be done, and lives to be saved. I do not mean to offend anyone by mentioning this, it is personal and we all have different religious beliefs. Thank you for visiting and for any feedback.

6 comments:

  1. I live with hubby and that is how is when he is manic. Hallucinations to the max. We are already organ donors. I have been forever.

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  2. TechnoBabe, I am glad that you are organ donars. I sometimes think we just forget to discuss such things. The odd time I will dream and they seem so real, with the sleep paralysis you can not move and you think you are awake. You have mentioned this about your husband before. thank gosh for medications and understanding from our loved ones.

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  3. wow. that was very vivid. cant imagine...and we are donors as well...might as well let someone use what is left....i wont need it. smiles.

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  4. I just think you are so brave to do as much as you do. I am so in awe. I can't imagine going through what you have to each day. But one does what one has to do.
    And I am an organ donor as well. Have been for a long, long time. 'Tis good for the reminder!
    Hugs
    SueAnn

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  5. We never know what others may be suffering from do we but you are right we all have our troubles.
    I use to be a blood donor and had filled out my drivers liscense to be an organ donor but since my cancer they don't want anything from me, It is just the way it is.......:-) Hugs

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  6. Bernie, hi....I am not sure what the criteria is but I am going to check it out. How have you been, you had said feeling a bit better,my prayers are with you...The weather is probably not helping your arthritis either. Take care my friend.

    SueAnn, I just keep going on...it has taken a while to get to this point. And good for you, for being an organ donor. hugs to you. Thanks for always cheering me up by your understanding.

    Brian, I am glad you are donors as well. You made me think of my Dad, that is something he would have said. lol. have a great day.

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