All day today I was thinking of my Doctors appointment yesterday.
Nothing serious, when you have a chronic condition,
and are unable to do previous things,
and you slowly see yourself
becoming more and more out of shape.
He suggested that I try Acquasize.
Now with a person with Cataplexy
the last place I am going into is a pool.
I basically asked him if I have a Cataplexy spell,
How long do you think it would take me to drown.
I understand about the water and how good it would be on my legs etc.
I told him I was trying to do what I could.
Once I was home I laid down,
my husband went out for some errands,
and I was resting on the couch,
almost in the dark.
Soon I was fast asleep.
My dream starts over at the Clinic,
As I walk into the building,
we were to be doing physical activities,
I swear everyone was working out, lifting weights,
doing all the machines, etc.
I was leaning up against a wall.
I was exhausted from the long corridor.
He saw me struggling.
I asked him if that was the class for the program I am in.
Oh yes, I told him I would love to do all those things,
but standing upright was a little difficult.
He said Come with me.
So we go to the next room,
He told me that right through that door,
amazing things would happen.
So I walked out the door, the fresh air felt wonderful,
and I started to walk, the first block was very hard,
and then suddenly I had more energy and I was actually running,
I was not toned and fit, but by the end of my dream I was.
I just kept running, and then I turned around and
I ran all the way back to the building.
The sweat felt great running down my back,
my arms had been swinging by my sides as I ran,
I was an athlete, capable and fit,
exhilerated, proud, confident.
And I awoke,
this was like a message to me,
saying you know what you have to do,
now get to it.
In the doctors office I had started to cry when I saw him,
and I said that every year I have gotten worse in the last seven years,
and that because of my immobility some days,
I said to him, with all my issues
and please tell it to me straight,
Do you think I am gonna check out of here soon.
And then I burst into tears.
There was silence in the room, I could see the pained look on my husbands face,
My doctor replied, the weight does not help, and because I have Narcolepsy with Severe Cataplexy,
and sleep so much he understands how hard it is for me to be active...
but everything else is fine,
no high blood pressure,
no high cholesterol,
He told me that to keep trying
to do what I can.
So never having dreamed about exercising before,
I believe that walking has to be the answer for me.
for my health to get better.
I know I can do it now.
really what other choice
do I have.
I really am in the best time of my life,
I don't mind how I look,
I love who I am..
i did not plan on getting sick,
no one does, but I need to do
everything I can to help myself.
I try to embrace everyday.
I am loving myself
to do this,
so I can
and be able to move around.
Maybe it was a message from God,
or my Dad, or my subconsious.
Whatever the reason.
I got the message.
Sorry to ramble on and on,
but I needed to say it.
After all it is about time.