Wednesday, August 19, 2009
A Surprising Day
I had three wonderful things happen today, The first is that while I was outside one of the bluejays came for a visit. It did not stay long. I have to get more peanuts. Their colors are so beautiful. The second thing is my Mom called today and there was a condolence card from a long lost friend that I have not seen or heard from since I was twenty years old. She gave me her email in the card, and I sent her a long email tonight. I was on a very different path when I was 20 than I am on now. I sent a letter to her parents about 15 years ago to forward to their daughter. I never heard from her until now. I had mixed feelings when i emailed her, where do you start, what do you say, the words just poured out from my heart , there is nothing else I can do. I hope she stays in touch. I told her that it had taken me a long time to get to where I am, without my bad choices I could not have arrived where I am today. Besides is that not what growing up is! Sometimes I joke and say if I knew I would get a ridiculous illness at 40, maybe I should have partied more. You have to laugh or you would sit and cry and what good would that do, I would then have great big red swollen eyes, no thankyou. Last night I stumbled by a new blog, and I went back today to visit her blog, she is my new follower named Gail, After reading some of her posts I read that she has been diagnosed with M.S. I also read the most relevant statement to my life, She said, "I am scared of my weakness, of my own brokeness." I have thought about that all day today. That is exactly how I felt when I first became ill, I like to be in control of my life, but suddenly it was controlling me. When I read her posts, it made me feel like I've been there, etc! I don't feel broken anymore because I came to terms with it and accepted that there was no operaation and no cure for it, but that with medication, regular sleep and schedules I would be okay. I don't think of me as having a disability because when I see me, I am still the same person. I certainly have isolated myself to a few close friends and family members that understand the situation! You may want to check out Gails blog at
My wish for you all today is that may you never feel that you are broken, I wish for a day filled with happy thoughts and a day where you might inspire just one person. It really could be life changing. I wish you enjoy every moment! Life is a gift. Enjoy.