Thursday, September 17, 2009

water features and tears.


Good Morning, This is a shot I took the other day while we had ventured out to have a look at one of the parks. I always love a water feature because of the sound of running water is so relaxing, if I could have gotten closer it would have been beautiful because of the spray that floats with the wind and lays on your face to cool you off even for a moment. The other thing I saw from this picture is how tumoltuous life can be. Sometime we hold all things inside and then blow our stacks like a water fountain. Now its not a pretty thing is it! Tonight talking to my Mom, ny feelings since my father died just poured out, I had been strong for everybody, being there, helping, guiding, listening, calling everyone and tonight just out of the blue I started to cry with my mom. She said to me you have been so strong through all of this, the strongest of us all. I said tonight I sound like a baby, I said not only am I sad, but I am angry too! Apparently it is all part of the greiving process. She said she had a good cry in the morning, then we eventually got to laughing. We finished our phone call on a positive note, after the call I thought where did all that come from? And I felt a weight lift from my shoulders. I can usually keep pretty positive, but occassionally you have a day that really knocks you on your butt, that was today! I look at the photo tonight and know Dad would be glad I phone mom every morning and night, he would love the spot we found, He always talked about when he got older he would like to do some fishing! Maybe he is, It's all good and I am okay! Maybe it will rain and there will be a rainbow! With life, we just have to wait a moment to be reminded of all our blessings!With that as my final thought, When I awake in the morning it really will be my best day! There is no other option!

13 comments:

  1. You are blessed to have your mom to talk with and to cry with. You are blessed to have eyes to see such beautiful sights as the one you took the picture of. You are blessed to have a husband you love and loves you back. You are blessed to have family and friends who know you intimately and love you and appreciate you. You are blessed to have a roof over your head. I know you know all these things, Cinner, because you say so in your blog, it helps me to remember to be thankful for my own blessings to start listing some of yours.

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  2. "Now" is the only time there is.
    So today really IS your best day ever.
    Wonderful insight.

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  3. I love the spray/mist of water features, too, and also the way it catches the light and turns into little rainbows underneath! It's okay to grieve, C-Woman, ya know? Even you! Being strong for others is a gift to them, surely, but being able to relinquish that to your own emotions is a gift to yourself. It doesn't mean a 'bad' day, just an honest day of self expression ... or a day of honest self expression, not keeping up the appearances for the sake of others. I'm certain it does your mom good, too, to be able to comfort YOU.

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  4. that was a beautiful picture; it looks like a wonderful place to just watch the water spraying for a few minutes

    I'm so sorry about your dad; I know it is sooo hard to have a parent pass. My dad died when I was really young so I don't remember him, but my mom died 3 years ago and although the raw grief is gone, the sadness is still there, although she was old and sick and tired and ready to go Home.

    I'm glad you can talk with your mom and that you call her often. And I'm glad you grieved by crying; I know it sounds silly that I would be glad for something like that, but I think tears are healing in a way; I always feel a bit better after a "good cry".

    And God catches each and every tear

    one day there won't be any more tears :)

    I look forward to that day

    I know this will be your very best day

    betty

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  5. Dear Cinner
    TechoBabe left a wonderful comment and I echo her words.
    You truly are blessed and share the joy of your blessings here on your blog.
    Thank you for that!

    I know it must have been a huge relief to let go of all the sadness you carried and having a good cry ... well, when I do that, my heart is relieved.

    I love the picture!

    Take good care Cinner and I will be back to visit you on Sunday or Monday.
    Off for the weekend.

    God bless!

    Margie:)

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  6. Yeah, what Toni said. It helps your Mom to get her power back to help her girl. Especially if you've been the strong one...it helps her to help you. So wonderful that you both had that gift to share with each other. Fabulous, in fact.

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  7. Hi holly,I think it was good for both of us, we both felt better today. I feel like the weight of the world is gone. Have a great weekend my friend. Are you being whisked away this weekend.

    Hi Margie, I truly am blessed and I know this, and I am especially blessed by my blogland friends, Thankyou for being you. Have a great weekend with your family.

    Betty, I definately felt better this morning, I am sorry about your Mom and your Dad when you were so young. I especially liked where you said God catches each and every tear. I am so thankful for so many things and am reminded of that everytime I get a comment from you. Thankyou, Until next week.

    Thanks Char, big hug back.

    Toni, I thought you were going to be away. It was definately a day of self expression and Today I feel that all is right with my world. thankyou for being you.

    Anne, yes live in the moment, thats all we have.

    TechnoBabe, Thanks for reminding me, I know how lucky I am. The cry did me good, I feel much better today and my Mom and I have really bonded...Take care my friend, thanks for putting it in black and white for me.

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  8. Death of a loved one will do this to us, I can be having a great day and something will remind me of my son or my husband and I become a bubbling fountain, crying my heart out then I get it together and remember the good times. These days come and go and I understand them better now....time will help, acceptance comes, closure doesn't. Be strong my friend and don't be so hard on yourself, life is good but can be filled once in a while with a sad memory....this is normal.....:-) Hugs

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  9. Bernie, I am so sorry about your son and your husband. I know what you mean,,,,you think your fine and then poof, and then your fine! Big Hug Bernie!

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  10. cindy...sweet hugs I'm sending to you....and you can cry anytime and we are all here to give you a shoulder !....I promise :)

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  11. Hi Beth, thanks beth, I swear you are all Godsends...I meant to tell you how much your daughter looks like you, I am very glad she is okay. Take care!

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  12. awww...touching post. loss is definitely hard but it's great that you and your mom have each other to lean on.

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