She sat in her hiding spot,
hanging her head supported by her hands,
elbows rested upon her knees,
The tears of anquish , blame, anger, saddness,rage and hurt,
rolling down her face like a waterfall runs down a mountain.
How could they have done this to her, how could she have let them,
Did she not yell or scream loud enough,
Did she not fight hard enough,
She could not tell anyone,
then she played the blame game for years,
She was smarter than to get into that car with them.
Her friends told her not too, but she did.
She faced the next year in absolute turmoil,
her parents wondered why their child had changed,
She could not tell them for she was sure her Dad would kill them,
So she held this all in at age fourteen,
She repressed her memories until they were gone,
She later learned in life they are never gone,
All came surfacing back for her when one of them had died,
She wondered was it her fault, for she had thought that many times.
And she cried, and still she told no one.
She told no one until she kept dreaming the same dream
over and over again,
She had gotten married and she finally told him about it,
and then the dreams stopped for awhile.
She went to a therapist to help her with this,
She seemed to be doing better,
And she learned to forgive herself for not having the sense to have filed charges.
She never told her father,
she told her Mother this year in Spring,
Her Mother asked her where had she been when this had happened,
and why she had not been told before.
She reached her hand to her Mothers and they held each other and cried.
And then my Mother and I walked into the house,
bonded closer than ever before.
I decided to write this because of the bravery of two other bloggers that have shared their stories.
Thank you Sara and Gail.
And to let others know they are not alone, and that it is never their fault.