Friday, December 11, 2009

A Visit from my Mom!

Hi Everybody, I am having a lovely visit with my Mom!
Although I have to say she is freezing and believes the frost on my window may be a contributor.
As you can see that is not just my window but the window from my neighbors as well next door.
I was as hot as could be and she said feel my hand. I swear she had it stuck in a snowbank.
Anyway turn up the heat we did, she sat with a blanket on, I sat fanning myself with a piece of paper.
We had a few good laughs over this!
We have had a quite a few good laughs!
She likes dogs, but coming from the farm, she never really understood why you would let dogs run
rampant around in your house,
although she did say they were very well behaved.
She did not say that at seven am. when my husband had just went out the door,
And the biggest dog jumped up on the futon where Mom was sleeping.
He was trying to look out to see his Dad leaving for work.
I was sound asleep and I hear,
Help get him off of hear!
I thought to myself, Can I just peel myself off the ceiling first?
Anyway Day one had a lot of laughs for us.
She brought 2 coolers here filled with food, which is fabulous!
I had very little room in my freezer, and she said well you must have another one.
No Mom one is enough, well SHe says I always had 3 on the farm!
Since my Dad has passed away she has still been cooking like she used to,
and she says she just can't eat it all. I told her she has to cut down. I might take
some of these pies to one of the Homeless Shelters!
I asked her today if she had forgotten  I am quite a large lady,
not matter how you put it I don't need more deserts.
For a little lady she can eat and eat.
If I eat anything it sticks to my no neck
That is what she loves to do is bake and show us how much love she has to give us that way.
She is staying a couple more days.
We had a few crying and laughing sessions today.
Our whole family misses my father something drastically,
She said some days she just cries and does not know why.
I just held her and said Mom of course you know why,
You lost your husband of 47 years!
,,,,,,
After we finished our girl fest what do you think we did,
We ate desert. a drumstick desert.
I will get the recipe.
I don't think anyone should not try this,
But I think it will be your favorite.
........
I have decided this, when a family goes through a crisis, and not everyone acts how others think they should,
I would just like to mention that nobody is perfect, nor should they be expected to be, and where as children do we get the ideas that because we have parents that they are qualified to be perfect, and that they should know everything just because. I think preasure to parents must be pretty hard!
I don't have kids but you know , grieving families can have very high expectations of
one another. When I was a child I felt like my Dad just knew everything about everything!
We had many good times, a few bad times, I would give everything for more times,
but we must survive knowing he is in a better place, it was his time!
I ache for myself when I miss him, to see my Mom breakdown saddens me.
We decided we are going to be fine, had another piece of desert,
went for a walk, The rest of the day we ate salad!
Lots of the day I spent just holding Mom as she talked about Dad.
I think talking is all part of the process.
She decorated for Christmas,
for which I am glad.
I can make my Mom laugh and laugh.
I know in my heart she is going to be just fine.
I will hold her hand along the way as much as I can.!
Peace to you all, wonderful blessings for the holiday season.
I will be back maybe by Sunday!
Keep love in your heart and have your Very Best Day!


21 comments:

  1. When I first went low-carb, I took all my carb stuff to the homeless.
    When I first started intermittent fasting, I gave my lunch to homeless people.
    Tell Mum "Hi!"
    Stay warm, ya'll....

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  2. Awww! What a wonderful visit you are having with your mom. Such a blessing! I miss my mom...she lives so far away!
    I lost my dad too and it took mom a long time to be able to get through the day without crying. Bless her heart! Allowing each other to grieve is so important!
    It is funny how mom's love to feed! LOL! I do the same thing now, with my kids. They say I am trying to fatten them up. LOL!
    Merry Christmas Cinner!
    Hugs
    SueAnn

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  3. I'm glad you both can be together for both the laughter and the tears. I know you are a great comfort to her and in turn, are comforted by her presence. enjoy her visit and let her love you the way she knows how. even if you have a small bite now and again - you can diet more when she goes back home. she will know next time not to bring so many sweets.

    i hope she stays warm - maybe she needs one of those snuggies for christmas! LOL

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  4. I think it is nice that your mom feels comfortable in your home to decorate it for you and to let down her guard enough to talk with you about her missing her husband. Sounds like great girl time. And even better, it is mother/daughter time.

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  5. eat a little dessert...one bite of everything equals a whole piece of one thing....that's how I like to look at it :)

    and spending this time with your mom is so special...enjoy every single second of it.....

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  6. baby it's cold outside...and you and your mom are filling the inside with laughter, smiles, tears and warmth (okay, so keep that paper fan handy). these memories - along with several bites of sweetness - will get both of you through anything.

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  7. What a great visit you are having with your Mom. Sounds like a 'warm' time even though it is colllld outside. I look forward to the dessert recipe. Give your Mom a hug for me (and tell her that my Mama has 3 freezers at her house too!! Is it a "Mom" thing??)
    I smiled at that. She sounds like a sweetheart.
    I know that you both miss your Dad. I hug you...through this post and on through the Christmas season. Many smiles to you, Cindy.
    Jackie

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  8. It sounds like you have a much love for your mm as you do for your dad.
    I lost my dad in the October so the first Christmas with out him was very had on our family as he was such a big part of the Christmas joy. Time does heal the wounds and it does get easier. Celebrate the season as your dad would want you to.

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  9. I feel the pain for you and your mum...holidays are bittersweet when we have lost a loved one....so glad you have each other to love and lean on......Big Hugs:-)

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  10. Big love to you Cinner and all who you love.

    Keep on enjoying all the moments of joy.

    I absolutely love the window shot.... and the heart shapes on the neighbours window are magical.

    xxx best wishes
    Ribbon

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  11. I believe this is the right healing process for the both of you....needing each other, holding each other and sharing...sharing him.
    Capture these precious moments while you can...worry about tomorrow later!
    Much love!

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  12. The firsts are always the hardest after someone we love so deeply is gone. It does get a little easier each year. Sounds like you are doing just what you should be doing.

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  13. Hi Gayle, thanks so much for visiting and your wisdom. They left early this morning but at least we got to spend 2 complete days. I can't imagine losing your husband after 47 years, but she is stronger than she knows. She does not like pets and I have 2 dogs, a cat and a bird so we had some interesting moments! lol. i visited your blog and love the pictures, i love the pictures of your grandson and the dog. Merry Christmas, all the best in the New Year.

    Cora, the only thing I can worry about today is staying warm. are you ready for this minus 41 with the windshield! Much love to you Cora.

    Ribbon, hi, I had to go back and look at the picture, I had not even seen the heart on the window. too cool. thanks for pointing it out to me. Thanks Ribbon for your kind words!

    Hi Bernie, the firsts are harD, I found it rather odd that my Dad was not here, as she has never visited me alone before. We had a wonderful time together, much needed for both of us. Be well Bernie....I think we need to move somewhere warm Bernie....minus 41, once it gets below minus 20 THEN I start to feel it. Stay warm, I would be sitting by your fireplace. take care, i have missed you the last couple of days. Take care, warm wishes

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  14. Liss, sorry to hear about the loss of your father...I did have a nice visit with my Mom, I will not see her at Christmas, so it was kinda like a little Christmas here. We had a very nice time, we are getting better, and it time I know it will be easier. Warm wishes to you Liss, take care.

    Jackie, your comment made me smile when you said your Mama has 3 freezers too. We really had a lovely visit. short but it was very nice. My brother, sister in law and my Mom left this am. It is minus 41 and they have a 10 hour drive ahead of them. I will be glad to get there call tonight when they get home.
    Love to you Jackie, thanks for your kind words, they always mean alot to me.

    Joie, Hi thanks for visiting and what a nice comment you left. I sure needed that paper fan. As she gets older, she gets smaller and colder. I kept that paper fan pretty close, my husband turned off our vent and he said to me, Honey its like an oven in here, I said yes I know, we will put up with it for a few days. She has left this morning 45 minutes ago and I already miss her. Best wishes to you during this Holiday season. I will be by to visit your blog, take care.

    Beth, eat a little of everything, I done you proud, I actually did pretty good. I had a great time, I hope it has stopped snowing for you. What a lot of snow you got. It is minus 41 here today. You should see my outfit, well maybe not. Some things are just not pretty. The Mexican poncho tells all. Big hug, hope you are having a great day. take care.

    TechnoBabe, hi, OH yes Mom and I can talk about anything, sometimes it surprises me. I had decided that any questions I had I was going to ask them because when my Dad died there were things I would have liked to have known...i am so glad I had the visit. Thank you so much for the lovely comments. I always look forward to them. Big hug my friend. take care.

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  15. Char, hi, I think she does need one of those snuggies. Oh it was some hot in my house, and then she would say dear do you mind if I turn the heat up. Of course anything she wanted, I told her at one point if she kept it up I would have to peel down to my birthday suit. lol. I think she thinks I am a drama queen. She is not a pet person at all, so I know my pets were a little underfeet, but she really managed okay. Hope you are well, I love your stocking you made. Christmas is so fast approaching us.and it is too cold to shop....it will get done. Big hug just in case your needing one. I will be by to visit you soon.

    SueAnn, I am sorry you miss your Mom, mine lives 10 hours away, but we try to see each other as often as we can. I had to laugh when you said your kids think your trying to fatten them up. And you know to me, nobody cooks as good as my Mother! We had a really nice visit. It was minus 41 when they left this am. I will be glad when I get the phone call that they made it home safe and sound. Take care and happy holidays to you and your family. Be well.

    Anne, your awesome. I knew you would do these things. How are you doing down there anyway. I am sure a bunch warmer than us...lol. take care Anne. big hug to you my friend.

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  16. Cinner, first of all the window shot is amazing!
    Then I had chills reading what you said. I'm trying to enjoy my parents as long as I can too, I know these moments are so very precious! Take care, my friend. Oh, my Mom does just the same, I know she puts all her love into cooking yummy food for me to enjoy, so I am grateful and I eat what she prepared. Then I usually have boiled food only for a couple of days ;)))
    Hugs,
    Monicaxx

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  17. Hi Cinner, You may or may not know that we lost Dad here too, the week before Thanksgiving. It's a tough transition, but it's somehow made easier when you go through it along side of loved ones.

    Hug your mom twice as much (which will seem like a whole lot). It will help you both. And eat the desserts.....

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  18. P.J. I am so sorry to hear about your Loss of your Dad. The week before Thanksgiving, not very long ago for sure, I wish you all the best and hope your family can be close. Did you know he was ill or was it sudden? Either way you just feel like a truck hit you. My prayers go out to you and your family, and you know what I am eating the desserts. I wish I could give you a great big hug right now and tell you it is all going to be okay, I have realized since May that everything is different. I am sure they would want us to be happy so we do our best everyday! Blessings to you.

    Hi Monica, your Mom does it too. Must be just in their blood. We had a good visit. It was great mother/daughter time. Big hug to you my friend. I hope you get to spend many many days with your parents. Merry Christmas to you and your family.

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  19. glad you are laughing together. enjoy!

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  20. Sounds like you had a wonderful visit. My husband's mom is the same. Every time she visits she tells us we can get a cheap basement freezer at Costco. I call Costco the "supersize me" store and really prefer not to shop there. I agree, one freezer is fine.

    I am sure that cooking is therapy for your mom. Both relaxing and comforting. Taking the extra food to a shelter sounds like a great plan! Karen

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  21. just wanted to say i enjoyed my visit here today. thanks for always stopping by.

    xo

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